When the Curtains Fall
by SilverMoreau
Summary: Ryan has always been the star of all school productions except for the spring musical. Now being part of the audience, he shares his feelings seating in the front row and another side of his life we never knew. Oneshot.


Hi there. I've always enjoyed reading dramatic fics but this is the first time I've written one. I'm not exactly asking for you to be nice, just reviews please. Constructive criticism is welcome.

Disclaimer: I do not own HSM, nor do I own the characters. I only own the plot.

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Weak.

That's what everyone calls me. Even my twin sister, Sharpay, whom I always thought was the only one who could really understand me, has now finally succumbed to the truth. Here I am, seating in the front row, watching a different couple portraying the leads in the spring musical, when it should have been us, me and Sharpay, up there, wowing the audience with the only thing I've ever been deemed excellent in. I closed my eyes, wishing this was not the painful truth.

Is it the truth? Maybe. I have never had an easy childhood. My mother and father separated when Sharpay and I were 7. My mother left us for another man, and left my sister and me to our father. As time passed, our fortune quickly disappeared, and my father would come home drunk every night, with us receiving beating on more than one occasion.

As I grew up, I don't know how I learned to submit myself to others so easily. I always thought that with what I've been through, I'd become strong, and finally defend myself from a sick, drunk bastard who was a horrendous excuse for a father. I was wrong.

I was in middle school when I discovered my love for theatre. It wasn't something I intended to do, but there was something that struck Sharpay and I to it. We've been acting in some school plays when we were still in kindergarten, but that was it. This is when I decided I could take over. The drama club, I mean. But then, there was Sharpay. I became her dog, her undermine, her minion. When we joined the Drama Club, we've learned to mask our true character, our true stories. Everyday, we put on a different face, for our peers to bow down to our newly found superiority. But still, no matter what people thought of me, I was weak. Even as my own sister's subordinate, I was called many names. Fag, drama geek, idiot. At first, I knew better than to take offense of what they accuse me of, but now, I'm not so sure.

Nothing much has changed when we were in high school. High school was afraid of us; my father was still an asshole. I'd come home everyday from school with a real picture that use to horrify me, but as the years passed by, I'd gotten used to the pig sty we call home, to our abusive father, to Sharpay crying everyday, and to me suffering too much emotional distress. Sometimes, I'd wake up in the morning, staring at the veins on my wrist and I wish I had a blade beside me and slash my pale skin, as to end all of our misery and suffering. But I never had the heart to do it.

Maybe that was what I loved most about theatre. That every time you were onstage, you portray a character which you know shall never exist, and shall be a product of your mere imaginations. Most times you'd bring that character to life; most times you'd wish you were that perfect character instead. But I knew better than to keep my hopes high. The fantasy I've portrayed always had an ending, where the story ends, the audience stands up, gives a standing ovation, and the curtain falls. Of course our father never went to our school plays until we were 9. He was too drunk to care. As I, bow my head to them graciously, smiling, thanking them for their warm appreciation, while deep inside I mourned why it had to end so soon.

For several years it had been always like this, until Gabriella Montez, then a new student, arrived at East High. She was such a lucky girl. I admit having feelings for her, but I was aware I was never going to get her. Besides, Sharpay despised her. After winning over Troy, she and her new lover took over the stage, replacing us. Replacing me. The only thing I ever turned to. The theatre was my only escape from the real world, from the painful reality that would face me. At night, I comforted Sharpay, saying that there was hope left, that there was more to life than just this. Even though the truth was, there was none.

We became understudies for Troy and Gabriella. Life was never indeed the same now that we were underdogs. But then again, what good is left in our lives? During a dance rehearsal, when I messed up, Sharpay was infuriated with me. She always did whenever I made mistakes, but lately, there was this certain glare in her eyes that seemed to say, _it's your fault. _After that, she snapped at me, and said, "You're weak, Ryan. This is why you never go anywhere, idiot." After saying those words she turned her back, with me, sitting on the floor thinking, that once again I had failed her, big time. Aside from a minor sprain, I was hurt. Hurt by the only person I felt that loved me my whole life.

"_You know the world can see us, in a way that's different than who we are."_ Troy and Gabriella had ended singing. The crowd stood up, cheering wildly for the two, exactly how they cheered for us when Sharpay and I were still the stars. I did the same, clapping my hands, and smiling, and I followed Troy and Gabriella.

"Great job", I told them, smiling. Both thanked me, and as I turned around, tears were forming in my eyes. I had once again, pulled off an act, and it hurt.

Weak. That's how I am, and will always be.

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Wow. This is my first attempt at a dramatic centric. How was it? Thank you so much for reading. Reviews are gladly appreciated. 


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